If you have ever gotten out of a serious relationship, you probably have experienced that quitting on relationships is not that hard. But, accepting it, and submitting your decision, that the bond you had with your girlfriend is over, comes with pain and terror. Some people, to shelter this pain, stay as friends even after their breakups.
In reality, they are just running after their ex to get the things they were like before. No matter what, don’t chase your ex. There is a reason that you two were separated, and it is fair for life to go on.
History is created not to repeat your mistake, and getting her back isn’t going to make your life easier. You need to learn how to avoid your ex-girlfriend.
And to do so, you should know seven reasons you should not get your ex-girlfriend back
1.Your History Will Haunt You
Every time you would see your ex, you will remember all the good things that you have done together. Thinking about those moments and not being able to do it now will haunt you. It will torture your emotions and eventually will become restrains on you from moving on.
Your history with her is the biggest reason to avoid your ex. You need to be rational and think about why did you two break up? Was it your fault or her fault?
Always start with acceptance, and being around her is not making things right. It is going to mess things up more, and you will end up with adverse mental health.
Can I get her back after being too needy?
2. It Isn’t Fair to Her
The possibility is that your ex is going through the same pain you are suffering from. Keeping on chasing her is only going to make it hard for her as well.
If you really cared about her, then you should think of moving on and leaving her alone.
Let her be a chapter of your life that didn’t end up well. There are plenty of pages still left in that book, and make sure to use them all. Otherwise, you utilize them sobbing and clean your tears.
3. What if You Decided to be Friends
If you guys have decided to become friends then the following things will happen:
- It will be hard for you to hang out
- It will be very uncomfortable to talk to in front of everyone
- People will give gaze
- It will be very uncomfortable to do project work
- You are always scared of each other from revealing each other’s secrets
- There will always be a shadow on you, whom you will be thinking about 24/7
- If you have moved on, your new partner will not accept this
And eventually, you need to end everything. It is not a bit rational to stay friends because you two will not see each other as the same people.
You two had something special that has ended, and those thoughts will not leave your minds.
4. Imagine The Sight of Her With a New “Friend”
Another reason to avoid your ex is to find her with her new boyfriend. Imagine if she has moved on, and introduces you to her new “friend” will you be happy for her? NO, it will not be. You will feel jealous, traumatized, and betrayed.
To prevent this from happening, don’t chase your ex and find someone to move on with. Your past will only destroy you as a human. Think if she cared about you. If the answer is YES, then why did she leave in the first place? Moving on is the only way not to see her with someone else.
5. You don’t want to addict yourself.
You don’t want your ex to become your addiction. To understand that you cannot think of without a glimpse of her face. You don’t need to be desperate about a thing that throws you away. You throw your trash all the time in the dustbin without second thoughts. She did the same to you.
You need to move on and find someone who treats you like you wanted to be treated. Making your past, your addiction is a problem, and you need to learn how to avoid your ex-girlfriend.
To really put this addiction aside, you need to block her from every social media site you know of, because you don’t want to be trapped in something psychologist says “compare and despair.”
You don’t need to compare your life with her. It doesn’t matter how much she is having; all that matters is that you are happy. So stop chasing!
6. You Need Some Time Alone
Instead of running to your girlfriend’s apartment, the moment she broke up with you is not the best thing to do. Both of you are full of emotions at that time and can make things worse. All you need is some time alone and think of a reason to avoid your ex. No matter what you do, don’t chase your ex.
Take some time alone and ponder what went wrong. After a week, if the wind has settled, try to explain yourself, but it is quite hard to get back at this point. You cannot build a house again with broken bricks. And even if you do, marks would still stay.
Instead of stitching a ripped-apart shirt, put on a new one because not only will you look good in it, you will feel confident to go to public as well. If you are not feeling secure wearing ripped-apart jeans, then it’s time to throw them away as well and move on to find a better pair.
7. She was not a genuine friend.
Many people think that when they go through a breakup, this means that they have missed a true friend. Remember, if she were your true girlfriend, she wouldn’t have left you hanging to dry.
Chasing her would mean giving her another chance to withdraw. This is an experience for you that is warning you that the person who you thought was your friend was actually not.
Now you have this chance to find your true friend, whom you can truly trust. And all of these experiences should tell you that life is short, and spending it with someone whom you can genuinely love is essential. Not with someone who can throw you away whenever she feels like it.
Conclusion
Relationships are hard, and some relationships end before you know they existed. Some end leaves a hole in the heart. Expressing your emotions does help to fill that void, but it is not a true remedy. Spending time with your ex is only going to widen that hole until you lost control over your emotion.
Instead of jumping into a bottomless well, find someone who you can hold hands with and cry with. There are several options to move on, and it’s you who have to work out the right way for you.
You need to figure out how to avoid your ex-girlfriend. Because staying with her or even close to her is not going to help you at all. If you cannot sort your things out, then go to a therapist for help. But whatever you do, don’t close your room’s door, isolate yourself and moan for months. Keep going with your life.
Don’t let this have an impact on your day-to-day life, and in a week or so, you will find yourself a new person.