Things were terrific at the beginning. He was always checking up on you, he couldn’t keep his hands off you, and he lit up any time you came into the room. Nowadays, he walks through the door with a nod and grunt, he barely ever looks your way, and he doesn’t seem to be as interested in having sex with you anymore. Here you will learn how to get your husband’s attention again. ‘
You think that you’ve done something wrong, so you ask; the answer is nothing is wrong. To bring back the part, you cook his favorite dinner, plan dates, and do things for him, but he still ignores you.
If you find that you’re doing above and beyond to get his attention and nothing is working, then it’s time to change tactics. He appears not to want your life revolving around him, so it’s time to make it all about you. It’s not that what you’re doing is a bad thing; it’s just not what he wants.
When women get married, they forget that they are a separate entity from their spouse and end up making it all about him. When he fell for you, you had your thing going on. If you’ve lost that, then that might be the ingredient you need to get his attention back.
The other aspect to consider is that you may have stopped doing the very things that brought you together. Does your husband still feel like a priority or has your job, kids, and home taken over?
Let’s take a deep dive into the things you can do to bring the spark back into your relationship
1. Do your own thing
Think back to the things you would do that would spark joy. If you’ve abandoned any, then that’s an indication that you’ve lost yourself and are perhaps spending too much time in your partner’s business.
His lack of attention toward you is a way for him to deter you so you can stop, but if you’re doing more, it appears that you’re not getting the hint. When you withdraw your attention from him and focus on yourself, then he will notice the change, and that will get his attention.
Therefore, become a little bit selfish and do things that make you happy.
If spending hours trying out new recipes your thing? Go for it. If you wanted to learn how to make ceramic pots so you can start DIY projects around the house, do it. Did you enjoy entertaining your friends over and having game nights? Arrange one.
The point here is not to show your husband that you have a life. If anything, you’re reverting to the vibrant and exciting person that he fell for.
There are things you have to be mindful of because he’s now in the picture so if you need to inform him about one thing or another do so, especially if it involves other people or traveling. For women who love outdoor activities, it would be best to inform him of your whereabouts, so he still feels involved in your life.
2. Leave the house
Not having a full-time job or being a stay-at-home mother can feel quite exhausting. Being in the house for long periods and only leaving when you have to run errands or chauffeur kids around can be tiring after a while.
It is not that you mind doing it; it’s that you don’t get to do much for yourself anymore. When that’s all you’ve been doing, you’re sadly no longer interesting. Your husband and even friends will know about your day because it’s the same old thing.
Getting back spice into your experience requires you to do new things. List everything you’d love to do outside the house during your spare time. If you need help moving things around so that you can have some time, do so.
Have brunch dates with your friends, get your hair done, go to events, basically anything that you’re interested in. The point is to have fun, and you’ll notice that you’ll bring different energy into the house that your husband will notice and appreciate.
3. Channel your inner sexy
A changed closest could also be something that he’s no longer attracted to. You likely put the effort in your clothes and appearance when you were dating or when your relationship was new. When those things go out the window after marriage, then he’d have a hard time remaining interested.
Look at your closet at the moment; is that what you dressed like when you were dating? If the answer is no, you need an overhaul. It doesn’t matter if you’ve lost or gained weight since; you can still look sexy.
Now that we’re talking about a wardrobe change, don’t get clothes you think he’ll like to attract his attention. Wear clothes that make you feel both feminine and sixy. Even when you’re around the house getting chores done, you can still look attractive. Get clothes that require minimum effort to put on and excaudate your desirable features.
Your aim every day should be to wear clothes that fit you right and make you feel attractive. It’s not just the clothing that he’ll notice; he’ll become aware of the confidence you carry yourself with.
4. Affirm him
So far, we’ve talked about things that you can do on your own so that you’re out of his space and living your life. However, when is the last time you told him you appreciate him for paying the bills, that you’re proud of him, and that you’re happy you’re with him?
He a man doesn’t feel wanted anymore, he’ll keep his distance. Let him know that you’re still attracted to him not just physically but as per everything that made you fall in love with him in the first place.
Praising and complimenting him affirms him and lets him know he’s doing the right thing. Even when he’s feeling low about one thing or another, he’ll know to come to you for a confidence boost.
If you’ve been quiet about the good things about him or you’ve been throwing jabs, then his attention will shift away from you as a defense mechanism. He wouldn’t want to engage with someone who’s not on his team. Remember how you’d flirt with him when you were getting to know each other? Get back to that.
5. Be his girlfriend
Before the kids and the in-laws, you were his girlfriend. You were his ride or die. When people get married, they tend to lose sight of their partner and focus on other things that they feel constitute a good marriage.
Even with the best intentions, a woman might concentrate on making sure the home is running seamlessly and neglect their husband. If he liked taking walks with you, spending hours awake talking, or other things that defined your earlier relationship, then consider getting back to that.
Have an honest conversation with him, and if you need to apologize to him, then do.
Let him know that you’re committed to making things right and bringing back the spark. Don’t forget that your relationship is essential and the basis of everything you currently have.
If your husband is the one always initiating things, sex included, then he’ll get to a point where he stops. He will feel like a bother or that you’re not interested in or attracted to him. Be the one to also initiate ideas, intimacy, and other things.
Let him know that you’re still as carefree, random, and wild as you were when you were younger and in love. When you get back to doing these things, he’ll know there’s more that he’s yet to discover.
When he’s in that frame of mind, he’ll want to continue pursuing you. His attention will shift to you, wanting to know what more about you there is to discover. It keeps things exciting, and he’ll do all he can to rise to the challenge.
Do something that he liked and appreciated, not things that you think he wants or would make you couple goals. Your relationship is unique, and what he likes is not what the next man will wish.
7. Let him lead
Correcting, controlling, and directing are some of the things that men dislike. They want to be trusted to take the lead. If you’ve found yourself picking him apart lately, then he certainly will not be interested in you.
He’d rather keep his distance than get torn apart every time he engages with you. If you’ve been feeling that he hasn’t been paying attention to you even when you talk, then you have to revisit your conversations to see where you could be going wrong.
Make the necessary changes and let him be the man in the relationship. It doesn’t mean that you stop being yourself or be a doormat; it’s merely giving him the chance to exercise his masculine energy. In the meantime, focus on cultivating your feminine energy.