In all the communities in the world sex is sacred and a vital aspect for a healthy relationship between two consenting adults going forward. Lack of which will lead to infidelity and in worst-case scenarios breakup or divorce.
Sex in the law of life, is a need and not want that can be done away with, the reason being that it serves several purposes in enhancing a person’s health, for one it offers pleasure, leads to procreation, reduces stress and helps build intimate connections.
Lack of sex is very detrimental, and many couples lose interest in each other after being together for long. They no longer find each other attractive, thus lack the desire to be intimate.
And if the above goes on for long, then the individuals tend to drift further apart and consequently find other partners that they are not used to. However, there are different things that a can woman can do to spice up the bedroom some of which will be discussed below.
10 Things a woman can do to spice up the bedroom
1. Sensual massage
One sure method that you can adopt to spark romance between you and your partner is by heating up things in the bedroom. When it is time to sleep you could change the routine from time to time and surprise your partner with a sensual massage, this will, however, require you to create time a lot more time.
And to make the above a success you first have to get rid of all external distractions by first switching off your phones and if you have kids send them out with a baby sitter or have one of your friends host them for the night.
You will, therefore, set up the mood in the bedroom, dim the lights or better yet use candles, and if you can find the ones with a scent they will work even better, turn on the music player and put on some soft romantic background music, then set up the massage area and here you have to ensure that the massage table or bed is as comfortable as it can be.
Any discomfort will take you back to square one and nothing would be pleasing, however, you could use pillows and towels to offer more comfort. And now that your partner is laid out straight, remember that this posture allows their body to relax.
You will then start a conversation that will lighten the mood, talk about the sweet romantic things that you have done together before, the little giggles and smiles will attract the right dreamy mood.
Now armed with massage oil you can start either from the back or the front, begin with the shoulders stroking them gently, for a man move slowly to the breast and nipples gently, then slowly to the stomach make sure that you gently rub every inch of his body.
When you reach the genital area stroke the inner thighs the area close to the genitals around the balls, be very gentle.
The above is sure to arouse him, then gently and very slowly start a genital massage and as you do this ensure that you keep the conversation going. Observe his reaction and stroke with regard to his feedback, the areas that he seems to enjoy the most should be massaged repeatedly.
The massage from this point becomes more erotic but be patient and let the energy build up slowly until it finally progresses to a natural conclusion.
2. Sex toys
Ever heard of sex toys, well the global sex toy industry is estimated to be more than $15 billion annually and the reason behind it is not because of the pleasure that they offer but rather because of the health benefits aligned therein.
As we grow older certain medical conditions alter our sex life, and for women, it is worse because menopause sets in early when compared to men. Sex toys, therefore, help to treat menopausal symptoms like vaginal atrophy and tightness caused by vulvodynia, surgical treatments or when taking the cancer treatments among others.
Vaginal tightness could also be caused by neurological conditions. Medications have for a long time been known to impact sexual health negatively and this goes for both the men and the women.
The common treatments that are taken in the management of blood pressure, the heart medicines or the antidepressants and antihistamines also go a long way in destabilizing the sex hormones.
Therefore, some of these health issues are better managed with sex toys. For example, by using the slim internal vibrator, women will benefit from an increase in blood flow to the vaginal area, which inadvertently improves some symptoms of the vaginal conditions.
Vibrators, in general, are also believed to create different types of sexual stimulation, which can help if one is suffering from low libido or cannot enjoy orgasm. They also help stretch the vaginal tissues to allow penetration with less pain.
Men also suffer from sexual problems that can be helped with sex toys, for example, conditions such as premature ejaculation, lack of libido, or erectile dysfunction. To this end, you could invest in the constriction rings that can help your man maintain his erection for long, make the penis firm and delay ejaculation.
There are also male vibrators that will encourage them to gain an erection while also stimulating their nerve endings.
The vibrators are also believed to help delay ejaculation because the sexual sensation that they offer is not the same as that offered by manual masturbation. As a woman, you could also get for your man the penile prostheses or the penile sleeves to allow him to have penetrative intercourse if they have a problem with achieving a full erection.
3. New sex styles
What better way can you spice up your sex life other than learning new sex styles and positions.
Missionary sex style is the most commonly used sex position but as a woman, it is your duty to spice up the sexual ordeal by coming up with some new sex styles.
However, you can still use the missionary but don’t just lie there and let your man do everything rather you can also encourage him through performance, in short, is that you shouldn’t just lie down like a dead cockroach.
There are so many sex positions but be advised against trying out the complicated ones because you might just ruin the mood, start small and as you become well acquainted you can then move to the more complex ones.
Some of the most common positions, therefore, are dog style, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, and oral sex among others.
4. Blow job
Men love blow jobs, and in recent times it works in both ways, you could, therefore, spice up your bedroom activities by giving your man a killer blow job. If you are good at it the more he would want to enjoy this special moment with you.
And if you have no idea of the different techniques, here is a sneak peek, for starters you could work on his balls, because this area is a sensitive part of his genitals, and for some people, the balls are even more sensitive than the penis.
The top part of a man’s penis is normally very sensitive especially if he hasn’t been cut. But there is no problem if he has been circumcised as you can, lick the tip of his penis utilizing the least pressure.
And when you are working on his balls, you could first kiss them, this will let you know if he is enjoying the play, but also make sure that your lips are pursed and a little wet.
You could also lick the balls and here ensure that your tongue is flat so that it can massage the balls while gently licking, the above ensures that you cover large areas of his testicles.
And if you want to speed things up then you will have to massage his balls with your mouth, slowly and gently grab them with your mouth and softly massage then with your tongue.
The keyword here is softly and you might, therefore, have to use the edible lubricants, it will also not be so bad if you found out which technique he prefers.
5. Dress sexy
Your dressing will either pique your man’s interests and feelings or dampen them altogether. Dressing up for sex occasionally is a good way of spicing up your bedroom.
You could be slutty or just simple it depends on the type of man that you have.
Some will love the change in character, while others might not appreciate it. You could also find nice sexy clothes that draw the outline of your body, a little bit short on the legs and expose some cleavage to get the message across.
Alternatively, you could get some very sexy lingerie, then set the mood by lighting the candles, play some sweet soft background music and prepare a warm birth, so that as soon as he gets into the bedroom he is automatically set in the mood. And remember no law restricts sex to the bed, thus start from the shower and finish on the bed.
Communication is key in any relationship even when having sex.
How you communicate with your partner can either turn him on or switch off the romantic feelings, anytime that you talk to your him you always have to be respectful and cautious not to provoke or hurt his feelings.
And while in the bedroom it is important that you as a woman you initiate communication, ask him what he likes done and what he does. At times you could try and just observe his actions and go with them, let him know that you can understand what he likes even if he is not willing to talk.
However, don’t go silent try to be more expressive and you will realize that he is following through.
Familiar with sexting, this is one of the things that will make your partner leave work and come home early.
There is no limit to the type of messages that you can exchange when sex chatting with your husband or boyfriend. Setting the mood early before he gets off work will surely spice things up for later on in the night.
Steamy foreplays are everyone’s favorite and can set the mood and at the same time spice up your bedroom. If your partner is not in the mood you can invest in some X-rated movies to set the right mood for the night. Lap dances are also a steamy way of creating the right mood, or you can also take turns in strip dancing for each other for maximum fun.
9. Don’t be conventional
Don’t be so conventional, once in a while surprise your man with some early morning sex, most people go to bed early and at times are too tired to engage in sex during the night, so when they have rested enough, start their morning by engaging foreplay and be sure to make it memorable with some sweet slow background music and you could also light the scented candles.
10. Steamy environment
Create a steamy environment, there is this feeling that you get whenever you are standing too close to your partner, the feeling of kissing and then things get heated up so fast.
You can try this in the bedroom one of the fine evenings after you have just had your shower as you prepare to sleep. So your job as a woman while still in your bathrobe, open it a little and stand very close to him and make like you want to kiss them but don’t.
Let the hairs at the back of his knees stand, and just exchange breaths, breathe in intervals and when you can no longer hold it let nature takes its cause.
Health benefits of sex
The benefits of having sex are not readily apparent to everyone and most people use it to keep their relationship with their partners interesting. Some take it as a responsibility; other people will have sex for procreation and some have sex for fun, as they do enjoy the activity.
The idea here is consistency because of the health benefits. Sex is believed to lower systolic blood pressure, and women will benefit from improved bladder control and enhanced libido.