Is He Pulling Away or Breaking Up? (Here’s What To Do!)

Is he pulling away or breaking up with me? The biggest worry of every woman on the planet! Well, don’t stress yourself out on this one because we are here to help you get clarity of things.

Whether you want to know why do men pull away or the solution to this problem, we will help you get practical answers in this guide. Just read it till the end, and you should be able to deal with the situation on your own, so let’s start:

Why is he pulling away all of a sudden?

is he pulling away all of a sudden

Why do men pull away suddenly? This is the question that comes to the mind of every woman when she notices her partner becoming distant and fears that she might lose him.

So she starts searching for answers to save her relationship. The biggest reason we suspect behind his sudden detachment is a personal crisis.

Yes, you’ve read it right, it doesn’t have to be another girl or the demise of his love for you, it can be as simple as a problem at work, stress due to something, or maybe a problem that he cannot share with you.

You need to understand that not just physiologically, but men are also emotionally different from women.

This means men won’t talk about every problem they are going through with their partner. So we suggest that you don’t doubt him unless you have a solid reason to and give him some space to sort his issues.

7 Subtle Signs He Wants to Break Up:

7 Signs He Wants to Break Up

Is he pulling away or breaking up? Want to know what’s happening in your case if you’ve noticed him being reserved? Well, to help you out, we have outlined some signs that you can look for.

  1. He ‘Hangs’ With Friends a Lot: Don’t get us wrong, it’s healthy for you and your man to spend time with friends. That being said, if he has started spending more time with colleagues and friends than you, it’s a sign he has lost interest in the relationship.
  2. He Starts Picking Fights: This one is a pretty common sign. When he loses interest in you, then he doesn’t care about compromise. Any mistake from your end or something he didn’t like will lead to a fight.
  3. No Proper Communication: He will start becoming vague about things happening in his life and at work. Then a time will come when there will be just cold silences and nothing much to talk about, that’s when you know he wants out.
  4. He Starts Changing Things: You will notice that he will start changing small things without even discussing it with you. For instance, you might see him getting a new haircut without asking for your approval, or he might start a new TV series without asking you. If you notice a lot of such things, he wants out.
  5. He Won’t Really Listen: Relationships thrive on deep talks and paying attention to what the other person is saying. But if your man is not showing any interest in anything you say to him and he just shrugs it off, it means he is not interested anymore.
  6. You Are No Longer a Priority: I know it hurts to see this sign, but if you are noticing him giving importance to everything ranging from career, friends, and family, but you then it’s a clear sign.
  7. He Starts Lacking Commitment: When men pull away, they stop seeing a future with you, which means most of your plans result in a ‘maybe.’ From dinner plans to going on vacations, he won’t commit.

If you notice most of these issues in your relationship, then you have a clear answer to ‘is he pulling away or breaking up,’ and he wants out.

When a Man Pulls Away, how Long Does it Last?

If you are wondering when/why do husbands pull away or why do men pull away in general, then you should refer to the reasons we discussed at the start of this guide.

When men pull away, they usually need space to figure out a problem in their life and on their own. Maybe your partner doesn’t want to stress you out and decides to tackle his issues alone. So now that the first part is clear let’s talk about how long this ‘pulling away’ phase can last.

Well, it depends, it can range from a few days to 2-3 weeks. If he is spending time with you but being distracted most of the time, then it only means he is facing some problems.

So wait for 2-3 weeks for him to sort the issues out. If he doesn’t become normal at this time, then you need to have a proper talk with him and get to know his issues and try to deal with them together.

Is He Testing Me by Pulling Away?

One answer; NO! Men don’t really test their partners because they are simple creatures who don’t really know how to play mind games. So if he is pulling away, then this can only mean he has some other things on his mind devouring his energy as we discussed above.

So what you can do is to give him his space and let him come back to you on his own. But if the duration of detachment prolongs, you have the right to have a calm and understanding talk with him.

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What to do When He Pulls Away Early in the Relationship?

He Pulls Away Early in the Relationship

If you are wondering if he is pulling away or breaking up at the beginning of your relationship, you need to look at the signs of breaking up we discussed above. If you cannot find most of them, it just means he is pulling away for another reason.

It can be personal, and he doesn’t want to discuss it with you because your relationship hasn’t matured yet. So the best thing to do is not to do anything! Let him sort out his problems and get back to you on his own.

In the meantime, just show him that you are OK with the situation and don’t place any demands that might further burden him.

How Can You Be High Value When He Pulls Away?

If you are sure he is pulling away just to be a jerk or getting you to submit to his unfair demands, then you need to be High Value. This will make him realize your worth and come to his senses – if he’s a sensible person. So here are some things to do:

  • Don’t let his tactic get to you in front of him. If you feel overwhelmed, calm yourself down by visiting a quiet place and letting everything out by crying there, it’s okay to shed a few or maybe tons of tears.
  • Start working on your feminine pull. This means you need to work on your looks, maintain your beauty and confidence. The next time he sees you, he will feel something, maybe regret.
  • You also need to start working on getting your life together. Put your mind at work, climb the corporate ladder, and excel in your career. When he sees you are not dependent on him, he’ll realize his stupidity because men like it when women depend on them for their needs.

Lastly, start living your life to its full extent. Go out with friends, take a vacation to cool off or just chill even if you are at home. Seeing you not really giving a damn will make him curious, and that will result in him coming back to you.

When He Pulls Away Should I Ignore Him?

Should I Ignore Him When He Pulls Away

At first, YES! You need time to figure out what’s happening; is he pulling away or breaking up? If you don’t see any signs for a breakup, then you should try giving him some time.

If he doesn’t show any improvement, you have two options: leave him be and work on getting your life better or ask him what’s bothering him and work on it as a couple.

When He Pulls Away, Do Nothing and Don’t Chase Him – is it the Right Approach?

Yes, it is a right approach most of the time because men sometimes need alone time just to get their head in the game of work or personal life. So it is best that you don’t do anything to disturb him.

If, after some time, you ask him why this distancing and he doesn’t want to share even after you insist, then don’t chase him. Leave him be and improve your life; he’ll come around if he cares.


Now you have a clear idea about the biggest question in a woman’s life – is he pulling away or breaking up? So all that is left is to implement the tips we have provided in this guide to deal with his pulling away phase and get out of this issue quickly. Just make sure not to push him too much at the beginning, wait for things to pan out on their own, or talk to him directly.

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